yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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