Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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