just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize