question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
