Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
