Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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