can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Randomize
