were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
