I think I just saw someone hide a body.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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