i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
