would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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