i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Randomize
