I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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