1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
