is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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