He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
