Christians are straight up FREAKS
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
