Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I can't put those talents on a resume
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize
