and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
