It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
