Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
