Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Don't make out with my wife yet
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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