Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize