let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
