She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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