all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
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