At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
i think im in europe. pls send help
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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