And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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