My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
