it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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