Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
