And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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