Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
