Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
