I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
