A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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