I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize