if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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