FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
