she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
