Don't you send me to vm
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
