I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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