yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
