Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
where are my eyebrows?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
