Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
