this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
