cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
