But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Randomize
