if i can run in heels then i can drive
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
