tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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